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      当前位置:首页 > 板报文稿 > 经典文章

      流泪也要有资格

      • 2019-05-28 14:54:08
      • 来源:黑板报
      • 编辑:黑板报
      • 己被围观573次
      流泪也要有资格
       

      不是每个搞笑的人都很开心的。
      尤其是每天都搞笑的人,每天被要求说同样段子的人,被要求表演同样节目的人。
      如同我新认识的豆哥。
      开了红色的宝马跑车从5年前跑到现在,那个价钱5年前如果买了房现在已经涨了不知多少了。而热衷于表面功夫的豆哥买了一辆宝马,于是价格就一直跌一直跌,唯一值钱的估计就只有宝马两个字了吧。这应该不算难过的事,因为他很得意地说:几年前,我开了保时捷下车,被人打劫,一个LV的包里装了十几万的现金,还有手机等等,我刚下车就被人弄晕了,后来我就收敛多了……?
      这个收敛多了的前辈表现出来的依然是打了鸡血的样子?;叵胛颐浅醮渭?,为了不让气氛冷下去,我们不停给自己加兴奋剂,说话的声音一个比一个大,说的事情一个比一个有包袱,周围的人全笑得趴下了,只有我和他青筋爆出还在互相夸对方资质好、有意思?;厝ダ鄣迷瓒济幌吹乖诖采暇退帕?,我毕竟是年轻人,估计他在路边停完车就在车里睡着了吧。
      约豆哥吃饭,阿昌哥之前把他吹上了天,一时还没落座就被要求说起段子来。
      “我以前穿了双很好的鞋,后来就被警察关起来了。那双鞋是我拣的,你知道为什么我被关起来吗?”
      我们都不知道。
      “因为这双鞋是我在别人阳台上拣到的。”
      “后来我被放出来,我就去水库炸鱼,又被警察抓了判了十年刑。我只炸死了三条鱼啊。你知道为什么我被判刑了吗?”
      我们还是不知道。
      “因为三条鱼死了之后,又有十个潜水员浮了上来……”
      “进了监狱之后,很多人看我不惯,三十多个人一起揍我,三十号人打了我半个多小时,我还没有倒下去。你知道为什么吗?”
      这下我知道了:“因为你练过吧。”
      “错了,因为他们把我吊起来打的……”
      我笑得很猛,也知道这个笑话他讲了应该不下一千遍了吧。
      豆哥埋着头吃泡椒鱼头里面的清水面。作为湖南人的他这道菜吃过也应该不下一百遍了吧。吃到一半,他抬起头来说:“非常好吃!”就好像第一次吃一样。
      看《真情指数》时,吴宗宪与蔡康永聊着聊着,开始满是泪光??础侗澈蟮墓适隆?,包小松包小柏也是嚎啕大哭。他们的说法都有唯一性——都是第一次在观众面前哭。
      靠幽默与搞笑出道的人,不到功成名就的那一天也许永远都没有流泪的资格,只能重复着自己的过去,打着鸡血活出人的一生。
      其实我也是这类型的人,只是做这样的人也需要台阶和资格。
      “豆哥后来不知道去哪了,每半年给我打一个电话,不知所云。每次电话都热情饱满,完全忘记我们半年前那个电话是无疾而终。其实我是个令人讨厌的人,对面这个人一直热切,我就觉得对方太使劲。如果对方稍显冷漠,我就觉得对方过于矫情。我总觉得每个人的表现都是有剧本的,作为自己的导演,他们能控制自己的一言一行,以及所表现的人物性格。
      这种令人讨厌的性格也不过是两年前开始好转,那时我才发现并不是每一个人都会对自己的任何言行负责——这并不是一个贬义,而是很多很多人活着并不如我,以及‘我以为‘的那样累。他们所有的举止都是发自当下最真切意志,无需控制,也无需反省。
      有同学曾经在宣讲会上问我,请问你是一个感性的人还是一个理性的人。我的回答是:我是一个理性的知道自己什么时候该感性,而在感性的时候理性的知道自己的底线在哪。我连着好几个月为这个解释暗喜,不过也是刚刚才发现,我活得似乎也挺使劲和矫情的。
      我妈说:没有人会一直正确,他们只会越来越正确。
      对于人生,亦是如此。”

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